WHEN, WHY, and HOW to Say NO.

Hope everyone has had an amazing week and holiday! Let’s get right into this:

Sometimes, it’s really hard to say no. Or, more importantly, when to say no. It’s often difficult to differentiate yourself between if you’re being a homebody or a smart decision maker. After all, you don’t want to seem like an uninteresting person, or someone who is never up to do anything fun. But sometimes saying no to something is crucial, whether it be no to an outing with friends, or to a workload to do over the weekend from your colleague.

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So –

How can you tell WHEN it’s the right time to say no?

  1. The Request Contradicts Your Beliefs
    • You know and value your beliefs, and so you need to draw the lines when a request threatens to contradict them.
      • For example, you may be a firm believer in kindness. Perhaps a friend asks you to throw a party and purposefully exclude someone they don’t like, just to be mean. In this instance, it would be the right thing to say no, because it contradicts your beliefs.
  2. The Request Oversteps Your Boundaries
    • Just like with beliefs, you have to know your boundaries. It is important to draw the line when a request threatens to overstep your boundaries.
      • For example, on the way home, a friend may want to walk down a dark alley at night to get there quicker. You know you’re either not allowed to go down the alley, or you just don’t have a good feeling about it. You have to draw the line, and say no. Stick to what you think is right.
  3. The Request Threatens Your Safety or the Safety of Others
    • Safety is number one. You should not do something that is unsafe or something that could harm or put yourself or others in danger.
  4. The Request Seems Off – You Know in Your Gut to You Should Say NO
    • To be straightforward: Trust your gut. If something seems off or like a bad idea, don’t do it. You don’t have to have a reason.

WHY it’s okay to say no:

  1. You Are The One Living Your Life. It’s YOUR LIFE!
    • YOU will ultimately be the one who has to live with the repercussions of your decisions, whether they be good or bad.
      • If you say yes to a commitment you don’t want, you’re going to have to deal with the consequences – maybe stress, maybe anxiety, maybe worry..
  2. There Will be More Opportunities.
    • Saying no to a request is not the be all and end all of your life. Ever hear the phrase, “Life goes on”? That’s because it does. If you’re worried about missing out, you really shouldn’t. There will be other opportunities and other requests. I’m sure this one is not your first, and it won’t be your last either.
  3. You Are Not Obligated to Say YES.
    • With media, peer pressure, and everyday stresses, it can feel like your obligation to say yes to every request you get. But you have to remember – you really don’t have to do anything. You can say no or yes or MAYBE! It’s not an obligation.
  4. You Have Priorities
    • You have to prioritize the things in your life. If you aren’t excited to do something, or you have another obligation, you don’t need to say yes. Don’t spread yourself too thin.

HOW to Say No:

– “No.”
– “I’m not comfortable doing that.”
– “I have another commitment.”
– “I received another invitation.”
– “I already have something else going on.”
– “That [time/activity/event/day] doesn’t work for me. Maybe another time!”
– “I’m sick.” (Cliche, I know. BUT SO USEFUL. 😉 )
– “Thanks, but no thanks.”
– “I have too much on my plate right now.”
– “I’m not committing/taking on anything right now.”
– “Thanks for thinking of me! But unfortunately I cannot make it.”
– “I don’t think I’m the best person for that/to ask. Sorry!”
– “That won’t work for me.”


Hope that helps! Leave any more ideas for any of these below. I want to do more posts like this, so tell me if you like these kinds of posts, or what you want to see! I’d really, really appreciate some feedback.

B E F O R E  Y O U  G O – Check out some similar posts you’ll LOVE!


Stay smart and sparkly!

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3 thoughts on “WHEN, WHY, and HOW to Say NO.

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